Monday, March 9, 2009

A bedtime story


We are taking a break from the Froggie who would a wooing go, and his friends Fluffy Bunny to bring you this important announcement.
No, really, this is not that important. I just wanted to do some bloggie stuff, living life stuff, like others do on their blogs. Except I dont make cute paper crafts or cake decorating. I am an amateur photographer, and definitely an amateur writer. So I don't have any colorful web designs to show you, but I do have horror stories galore.
Here is one you are sure to enjoy.
As most of you know, I am a nurse in an urban hospital. I work weekend nights with some of the greatest people I have ever met. We are a top notch team of nurses who have over 150 collective years of experience.
How we all ended up on the unit and the same shift, I will never know. We work in the Cardiovascular surgery ICU, and we have some really sick people come through needing various surgical interventions. Most make it. Some do not.
Of the ones who do not live, the ones that really get to me are the young people and when I say young, I mean the 20-60 age group who like to smoke crystal meth and crack cocaine. Two of the most wicked drugs in the world.
See? What happens here is usually the patient is hypertensive anyway, and instead of buying their blood pressure medication, they buy crack and crystal. Now why in the hell would a 60 year old hypertensive smoke a rock of crack, you may ask? Well, we ask that question all of the time and really don't really know, but if you look at the medication history provided by his/her "shocked" family, you will see things on there like... aspirin, plavix, lopressor, and sometimes viagra. Way too old to be smokin' the rock and getting crazy on Viagra.
Ok, I admit it. I'm being judgmental, the first "no no" of nursing.
Well sorry but after pouring countless gallons of blood into people who we try to save, after their aortas dissect from stem to stern, I can't help but be a little judgmental. Once or twice we were able to pull them out of the icy grip of death, or the grim ripper as we like to call him. (Not reaper, ripper), only to have the dumb ass go home after 4 or 6 months in the hospital (usually without insurance), and smoke some more crack. Guess what happens next?
They come back in dissecting all over again..For those of you who are not familiar with the term dissecting aorta, it is when the inner lining of that really big artery that carries blood from your heart down to the rest of your body, rips the length of the vessel, it usually starts in the Aortic valve and makes its way to the iliac arteries. That's the ones that feed your legs. In between it hits your renal arteries and sometimes the coronarys. All of this is caused by a violent rise in blood pressure beating the inside of the arteries and eventually, they begin to tear along the inside or Intima. Usually the outside wall holds, but this is not a comfort, because it won't hold for long. When that happens, it is called a rupture and you can pretty much kiss yer own ass goodbye.

So, the moral of this story is, if you smoke crack or crystal meth, you are on a hellbound train. You will wind up dead. In other words, it will kill your ass.

If you know a smoker of crack, please print this off and give it to them.
You can tell them we will be seeing the insides of them after their insides explode. This cannot be over-exaggerated.

By the way, this is where a lot of the blood supply goes.
And not one of these humans ever has insurance, so guess who's paying for all of this excellent nursing and medical care?
You and me: the taxpayers and insured.

We pour it in, and out it pours back .
All for the love of a rock of crack.

(Sorry I had to do a little rhyme.)

I hope I could shed a little light on the state of our medical situation in my little corner of the world. I know we are not isolated.

The news isn't all bad, though. For those of us who care about our bodies there are so many wonderful and new drugs as well as procedures to keep the surgeons away.

Take good care of your body. Don't smoke crack.

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