Friday, May 29, 2009

My Lions

My Lions

Lions, my lions.
Strong and yellow eyed
Muscled, maned
and menacing
the color of grass,
hiding in plain view.
Silently measuring
speed and distances
planning the pounce,
panting with hot breath.

Lions, my lions.
Well, dad, were there
too many hours lined up
on the clock for you?
Too much time to fill?
Bone tired, soul weary
Iron will, worn thin.
Rusted, rooted, wretched.
You took a side door
that we didn't see.
The epitaph reads wrong
Your reason was warped but
your rationale was right.

Lions, my Lions.
Mother, there is life in your pain
pain in this life, after all.
and for all of this
endless suffering, surely
you are becoming an angel,
earning your wings.
Breeder of family
Brooder of ties that bind
Tending of home fires,
of futures, and fathers who fall.
Such mortal pain shall surely be rewarded.

Lions, my lions
The head knows the truth but
The heart will not hear it.
It lays naked on the floor
for any who would look.
Yet veils cover the eyes
fog clouds the brain.
What the heart wishes to see
is never the reality.

A mask hides the face
a menace unknown
Emerging enraged,
as points razor sharp.
ripping the fragile fabric facade
draped over certainty
of what is thought to be true
into shreds of grief
of disbelief,
for who we knew
used to be you.

Lions, my lions.
We the victors,
the virtuous women.
We breed glowing eggs in the
dream-scape of life.
And on our journey we take
translucent wanting and
Our memories of water.

Tuesday, May 19, 2009

Stuff and Junque

Well all the excitment of the whirlwind beginning of May is over and I'm whupped. How can you get so tired from having so much fun? I need a vacation to get over my vacation....LOL. So to recap, a good time was had by all...Now back to work. My last creative writing workshop is looming and Im kinda sad. But I think I need to move forward now and either write that book or go back to school myself. I have been a nurse for 24 years and I would like to change gears, but I would like it to involve writing, reading or editing or something wordy. I know I am done with health care schooling. I just can't do that anymore. When I see my friends struggling with their studies as they go through various programs such as Nurse Anesthetist school or to become Nurse Practitioners, I know I don't have that stuff in me anymore. So here are some pictures of my little trip to Destin to prove I had fun. We visited with some friends who have a sailing business and they were so nice and showed us a wonderful time on their boat as well as had us over for dinner the next night. Thanks Chris and Rex!!

Sunday, May 10, 2009

Graduation Celebration

Well, she did it!! She got her diploma and we survived the week. I am so pleased and happy for my daughter, she has marked one of several big milestones of her life. I hope she can one day appreciate what she accomplished. I know some people don't think a high school diploma is a big deal, but when you think about what all lead up to it...12 years of commitment to a goal it puts it in a different perspective. How many things do people commit to for 12 years. I can't say it was an easy road for her, or us for that matter. There were obstacles and she had the expected bumps in the road, but overcame it all and became a self sufficient learner. She taught herself how to find resources and ways to seek answers that were not immediately available. That is one beautiful thing about homeschool, is that you don't always have someone there with the right answer, and one of the most useful things you can learn is how to find out what you need to know.

We had some great tutors, too.

As for me, I loved having her home so I could spend time with her and watch her grow and learn.

Graduation is the end of one thing, but the beginning of another so we are happy and sad at the same time. She is now a woman and has stepped over that threshold of childhood.

I look forward to all the next milestones in your life, my sweet girl.

Tuesday, May 5, 2009

My little baby girl Lindsey

My baby graduates next weekend and I am so proud of her.

She is so smart and funny and bossy, Im positive she is going to go far in life.

She knows shes a "whoops" baby, but I wonder If she knows how much fun I had with her. She is 10 years younger than her oldest sibling, and shes also my late-in-life baby. My other two kids and me sort of grew up together, and I was very self absorbed and trying to go to school to be a nurse and make some money for us to live we struggled alot.

But, by the time she came along, my nursing school was over and I was well established in my job working weekends, so I got to spend alot of time with her and we got to be pretty good pals. I really am glad we decided to do the homeschool route, because who knows how things would have turned out if she had continued to have to fight her way thru public school in the 2nd most violent city in the US.

As a veteran homeschool student, she is good at finding resources and being an independent learner and self starter, some really good qualities in a changing world.

I have enjoyed being at home with her, probably more than she has enjoyed me being here. This year has been very different because the rest of the family is home all day now, so that makes the time we had together even better.
So this week we are planning a graduation for Saturday, and then a barbeque afterward, then it's off to Destin, Florida to lounge around by the sea and rest. I hope to have some sea inspired writing to share with any who would read it. At least I know I will have some sun and a belly full of shrimp.....

I can't believe she is all grown up.... She will always be MY baby.